Category Archives: Wine Sales

Grape of the Month: Pinot Noir

I’m often asked what my favorite kind of wine is.  My answer, like most wine enthusiasts I know, is “I don’t have a favorite.”  I think of wines like parents think of children– you love them all equally, just in … Continue reading

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Dear Customer Part 13

Dear Customer, I get that you want sweet wine that tastes like Welch’s. And I understand you don’t care. At all. But seriously. Asking me which of Barefoot or Yellow Tail Moscato is better is like asking a butcher who … Continue reading

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Dear Distributor Part 2

Dear Distributor, Stop sending me paraphernalia with the cases of wine I order.  I am not spending my time hanging your shit on shelves or putting stuff on the necks of bottles.  Do your own merchandising.

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Dear Customer Part 12

Dear Customer, No, I do not sell the wine you had on your cruise in Mexico/the Bahamas/the Mediterranean.  No, I can’t find it and order it for you.  Try one of the 6,000 that are distributed in the Midwest. Also, … Continue reading

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Dear Customer Part 11

Dear Customer, Do not send the cheapest, least knowledgeable person you know to shop for wine for your dinner or party.  If you do, I will assume you don’t give a shit what you’re drinking and send your friend off … Continue reading

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Dear Distributor Part 1

Dear Distributor, If you haven’t called on me in eight months, you are very bad at your job.  Do not be surprised when I don’t invite you to participate in an event I organized a month ago with reps who … Continue reading

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Dear Customer Part 10

Dear Customer, Get off the phone.  If you are even considering taking a call or texting while in the store, don’t bother seeking me out.  I will ignore you.  Seriously, I’m not going to waste my time with you if … Continue reading

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Dear Customer Part 8

Dear Customer, Do not interrupt me when I am assisting another customer.  Would you barge into your doctor’s office while he’s examining another patient? You are not the only person in the world.  Get over yourself and wait your turn.

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